Blowjob 101

Hello readers (or should I say class 😉),

Welcome back to SmalleeWrites💃💃💃.

Your favourite small blogger is happy to have you here!

And I hope this post meets you in impeccable health.

We’ve all seen the cucumber videos, and these women that make it look like brain surgery, so I’ll like you to think of this article as Oral Sex for Dummies.

Now, if you’re ready to get your hands dirty, keep reading.

You have to go at it like a gangster. Put your game face on. It’s like anything else: If you’re going to do something, you have to do it right.

Grab the microphone!

image-6.jpeg

You cannot be afraid to touch it. You can’t put a rubber on it. You cannot go in there half-assed. If you are not going to do it right, it is best you just tell him you cannot do it at all.

Think of yourself as an undercover agent on a mission. Your goal is to make his eyes roll up into the back of his head. Once you’ve reached this point, know that you have achieved perfection. You can feel totally satisfied. You can confidently say to yourself, “I’ve got him now!”

But please remember there are no teeth used in performing oral sex on a guy (unless he’s into that kind of thing). Ever. If you leave teeth marks on a man’s penis, you have violated the blowjob code. Use no teeth.

On that note, I welcome you to…

BLOWJOB 101

First, I’ll like to warn you that this is going to be a long post.

This class will be divided into seven (7) chapters:

  1. Communication and Preferences
  2. Enthusiasm and Confidence
  3. The Build Up
  4. Foreplay
  5. Blowjob Tips
  6. Blow Him
  7. Spit or Swallow?

Now, lets get into it…

Chapter 1- Communication and Preferences

Effective communication will help you to quickly figure out what techniques your man adores and which ones he finds so-so.

  • Some guys love it when you deep throat them, some don’t care for it at all.
  • Some guys love the idea of you swallowing their load while others are turned off by it.
  • Some guys fantasize about giving you a facial, but others find it pointless.
  • Some guys may adore you fondling their testicles during oral sex, while others hate it.

The point I am trying to make is that the man you have in mind is going to adore some of the techniques from this class while he isn’t going to get much from other techniques and ideas. The key is talking to your man and learning his preferences.

But communication isn’t just about accommodating his desires, it’s about yours too. According to one study, up to half of women between 16 and 25 have felt pressured into giving their man a blow job and in another study, 12% of young adult women had repeatedly engaged in oral sex and other sexual practices they disliked because their partner insisted on it. This isn’t right or fair and it certainly doesn’t make for a great relationship. If you aren’t comfortable with doing something, then it’s important your man understands and respects this.

Chapter 2: Enthusiasm and Confidence

There is a mountain of knowledge here on how to give your man a perfect blow job, and you may be wondering what the “best technique” is that you can use on him to blow his mind.

The number one technique is actually an attitude. It’s…

Enthusiasm

Enthusiasm is by far the most powerful thing you can incorporate into your blow job skills AND sex life.

Think about this for a minute… Have you ever been involved with a guy who seemed almost uninterested and unenthusiastic about getting it on? It’s a real turn off, isn’t it? And it can make you feel very unsexy.

On the other hand, have you ever been with a guy who can’t keep his hands off you, who looks at you like a lion eyeing his prey and when you do get into bed with him, he kisses you with intense passion and makes love to you with his entire being. It’s like he’s possessed and all he can think of is…you. It’s incredibly arousing. He’s acting with complete enthusiasm and focus on you.

This is the power of enthusiasm.

When you give your boyfriend a blow job (or hand job or have sex with him) while being completely enthusiastic about it and totally focused on him, it’s going to massively turn him on.

So even if you’re aren’t totally sure about what you’re doing, just focus on being enthusiastic. You’ll be surprised at how much this enhances the experience for your man.

Chapter 3:  The Build Up

how-to-give-a-good-blow-job.jpg

Some men are ready and eager for sex or a blow job 24/7. But this isn’t true for all of them. In fact, some guys take a lot of coaxing just to turn them on and get them in the mood.

Here are a few different ideas you should use to get him worked up before you even get physical with him:

Sexy Selfies

Sending your man a sexy selfie while he is at work or out with friends -yes, you read that right!- is the perfect way to turn him on and get him ready for fun times ahead..

Dirty Texts & Sexting

While your man is at work or is just out, try sending him some dirty texts, letting him know about what’s on your mind and what you are planning for later. It can be something filthy like, “I can’t wait to feel you explode in my mouth tonight.” Or it can be something a little more reserved like, “Can’t wait to see you later…and my lips can’t wait either ;)” Or you can describe in detail the blow job tip you’ve just learned and are going to perform on him.

Out & About

If you are both out in public together where you can’t possibly be intimate, then it’s the perfect time to tease him. Lean across and whisper something in his ear to get him thinking about what you’ve got planned for later. Also, try rubbing his thighs suggestively and withdrawing your hands.

A General Guideline For Tantalizing Him

Often guys get turned on by a lot of things that many women don’t find arousing, so keep this in mind when you are coming up with your own ideas and tactics to tease him and build up to a blow job.

This explains why your guy may love seeing a nude picture, even though one doesn’t do much for you. It also explains why you might get crazy horny when reading erotica, while it might put your man to sleep. In other words; just because something turns you on, it doesn’t mean it will turn him on, and vice-versa.

Chapter 4: Foreplay

It may be surprising to hear, but some men love foreplay to be drawn out significantly longer more than most women think. So, while giving him a quickie BJ can be super hot for both of you (like say sneaking away for a few minutes at a party), you’ll find that a slow, teasing build up is going to result in your man blowing a bigger load… and a bigger smile on his face. This is probably one of the most powerful, but also the most overlooked blow job tip you can learn. With this in mind, here are a bunch of great “fellatio foreplay” tips that you can use before giving your man head:

Hand Massage 

This one is probably the easiest to get right. While you are kissing him or just talking to him or while you’re just physically close to him, put your hand on his crotch. So your hand should be resting on his briefs or his trousers. To make it smooth, start by first placing your hand on his leg and moving it up from there. Then just softly start massaging his shlong and testicles outside of his trousers/briefs.

It’s as simple as softly running your hands over this area, but you can also get a little more aggressive by softly grabbing and squeezing his manhood and balls and then releasing the pressure.

After massaging him for a few minutes, help him take off his trousers and briefs. Then just keep doing what you were doing, running your hands over his manhood. If you like, you can also softly trace your fingers up and down and around his balls.

So Close, Yet So…

Another thing you can do to build up to your blow job is to work around his manhood first. So instead of just taking him into your mouth, you could:

  • Kiss around his crotch and groin.
  • Gently massage his balls using your tongue.
  • Softly “tickle” his testicles with the tips of your fingers.
  • Put his balls in your mouth and suck them instead
  • Lick his belly button as if you’re giving head to a girl.

The Kiss Trail 

A red hot blow job tip that allows you to move smoothly from kissing your man to taking him in your mouth is to work slowly down from his lips to his penis by kissing your way down. So you can move from his lips to his neck to his chest to his stomach until you reach his groin area. Of course, this works way better if he is completely naked.

Now, let’s learn what blow job tips will drive your man wild!

Chapter 5: Blowjob Tips

The first tip in this class is Flicking the Frenulum

PE_penis_diagram.jpg

For many men, the most sensitive spot on their penis is their frenulum. The frenulum is the underside of the tip of their penis, where the glans joins his shaft (include a picture).

An intensely pleasurable blow job tip that you can use on him is to use the tip of your tongue to apply a gentle flicking motion to it. While you are naturally going to stimulate his frenulum while sucking him off, this technique is different as you will be focusing all your stimulation on a very specific point on his penis.

Flicking his frenulum can be the perfect way to start off your blow jobs before taking him into your mouth. You can flick it up-and-down, side-to-side, in circles or by doing a combination of all three.

Bear in mind that if your man has been circumcised, there is a chance that his frenulum has been removed.

The second tip is Toyssssss

Bring sex toys in. If you want to experiment with other forms of stimulation, or make the blow job more intense, there are a few different sex toys that can enhance the experience.

Rings are fun to try out with a partner – they keep the penis harder, for longer, and a vibrator is a great way to get the balls in on the action. Sex toys aren’t just for clit stimulation (though they sure do get the job done). Grab a handheld clit vibrator and hold it in your hand to massage the balls.

You can also press it into the perineum, the patch of skin between the balls and anus, a nerve-rich pleasure center. Again, ask your partner if this is something they’d be into. Sex toys up the sense of eroticism and during oral sex, it can be extremely intense (in a good way).

The third tip is to Add a Little Flavor

Let’s be honest, the taste of a penis is not exactly like chocolate cake. Sure, it can be sexy at the beginning, but a few minutes go by and suddenly you might find yourself thinking, “Hmm…I’m ready to do something else.”

Flavored lube is the way to go. Adding a little tasty lubricant changes the whole game. The problem? A lot of flavored lubes are too sweet, too minty, or taste too much like cough syrup. Don’t be afraid to experiment with different flavored lubes to actually find one you like.

Just remember, flavored lube is NOT good for vaginas. It’s full of artificial ingredients and sugar, and unless you want to say hello to yeast infection, if you use it, be sure to rinse it off thoroughly before having penetrative sex.

Chapter 6: Blow Him

-Enthusiasm

I know I’ve said this before, but I’ll say it again to show you that it can’t be understated: the first thing you have to do is make sure you do it with a high level of animalistic and almost insatiable enthusiasm.

Most guys see this as the single most important technique you can have in the bedroom to be good at sex and oral sex, and to further explain how important it is, I want you to do something. Imagine this scenario…

Your man hasn’t seen you for almost an entire week, and you’re going over to his place. When he opens the door and lays his eyes on you, he immediately rushes forward and grabs hold of you. As he embraces you, he leans in, opens his mouth and gives you the most intense kiss you’ve ever received.

But he doesn’t stop there, he picks you up and brings you into the bedroom, takes your clothes off and has his way with you. You don’t want him to stop for a second and even if you tried to stop him, you probably couldn’t as he is acting on every animalistic impulse in his body. There isn’t a single logical thought going through his head right now. It’s just pure testosterone and lust running through his veins.

There is something ridiculously hot and passionate about this…his passionate enthusiasm. When you reverse the situation above, and you become the aggressor, the one who acts out of pure lust, and you attack your man with animalistic enthusiasm while sucking his dick, you can make it an experience that surpasses anything he could ever imagine. Even if you aren’t using new techniques or positions in the bedroom…it can make a dull sex life into a highly charged one.

-Your Head in His Hands

Screenshot_2019-07-03-04-51-20-2806007830-1562126109886.png

A super powerful way to intensify this oral sex experience is to allow your man to take control and dictate things. You can do this by getting your man to hold your head while you keep your arms down by your side or even tied behind your back (if you’re into that sort of thing)

Now that your man is in control, he can dictate how fast you go and how deep you take it. All of this is perfect if you enjoy your man being in total control, but it’s not so much fun if you have an overactive gag reflex…unless of course you like the idea of throwing up midway through.

Some people call this “skull-fucking,” especially when your man gets aggressive, but we see it more as a simple act of submission, of handing over power to your man. If the idea of submitting to your man turns you on and you know he respects you enough not to go too fast or too deep, then putting your head in his hands can be incredibly erotic, arousing and fun for both of you.

-Deepthroat

A significant aspect that makes deep throating your boyfriend much easier is choosing a BJ position that works for you. If you have very little experience with giving your man a blowjob or you have an over active gag reflex, then I highly suggest that you first start by learning and using these 3 BJ positions.

  1. Kneeling Blow Job Positionkneeling.png

  2. Chair Blow Job Position PhotoGrid_1562127358177.jpg

  3. Regular Blow Job Position

image

Once you are comfortable with the basic BJ positions above, you should try out some of these intermediate positions. Each of these blowjob positions gives your man a little more control over how deep you take him, so if your throat is very sensitive be careful! Of course, you can always learn how to better control your gag reflex.

The next set of positions are called “Intermediate” blow job positions because they take a little more skill from you to perform them, but they don’t necessarily give your man more pleasure.

  1. Car Blow Job Positionimage

  2. Thigh Pillow Blow Job PositionPhotoGrid_1562128850184.jpg

To perform the thigh pillow position, you have to use his thighs as a pillow. Your man gets into position by lying down on his side with his lower leg in front of his upper leg like in the illustration. You then rest your head on his thigh while also lying down on your side, and give him a blowjob as you normally would.

Bonus tip: This position doubles as a variation of the 69 position.

  1. Patient Blow Job PositionPhotoGrid_1562128999362.jpg

This position gets its name from the fact that your man will be reclining on a sofa just like he would be if he were in the hospital.

Once you are comfortable trying out these blow job positions, it’s time to move on to trying some more advanced positions for giving your man head.

Just like I mentioned in the “Intermediate” section, you might believe that these advanced blowjob positions give your man far more pleasure than the intermediate and basic positions. But that’s not quite true. These positions are in the advanced section because they are harder for you to do.

All of these oral sex positions give your man way more control and you less control, which is a major turn on for some guys, and you may find it pretty hot too. In other words, your man will decide how deep his penis will go into your mouth. So if you have a ticklish and sensitive throat, you should try the Basic or Intermediate blow job positions instead.

If you are already comfortable giving your man deep throat, then you will both adore the positions below:

  1. Jack Hammer Blowjob PositionPhotoGrid_1562130355627.jpg

  2. Lie Back Blowjob Positionthe-mouth-off-1525875451

  3. Plumber Blowjob Position (otherwise  known as the “face fuck” position) plumber.png

What blow job position you use with your man is only one part to becoming a blow job queen. For these last three especially, you’d have to do extra work to…

-Improve your Gag Reflex 

It’s common for your muscles to tense up while performing oral… especially if you’re thinking I’m going to gag, I’m going to puke the entire time. The trick is to relax your body and mind beforehand. And you know what really helps a girl unwind? Knocking out an orgasm or two ahead of the BJ. Food for thought, guys.

And it’s not just about relaxing your throat during a blow job: your mouth should be loose, too. Don’t worry about keeping your lips super tight around his penis while you’re going down. If you let your lips fall open, you open up your throat a lot more. And don’t worry about getting drool everywhere: a little extra lubrication never hurt anybody.

You can actually train yourself to deep throat deeper dance for longer, but it’s going to take some time to get your gag reflex under control. Start off by using a clean finger and placing it towards the back of your throat until you’re at the point that usually makes you gag. Relax your throat and breathe through your nose, holding for 10 seconds, and then pulling back.

Do this a few times, then start to go deeper—you’ll notice your gag reflex becoming less sensitive. If you have a dildo or phallic vibrator, you can start to practice with that as well as you get more comfortable. It may take awhile, but eventually, your throat will be ready for more.

-Don’t Leave The Balls Hanging

When you’re going down on your man, you probably pay a lot of attention to his penis – the shaft and head. These are sensitive parts that are worthy of your attentions, but they’re certainly not the only part of your man’s body that is sensitive. Many women forget – or avoid – to stimulate his balls at all. But sucking balls and other types of testicle stimulation can feel great, and you’ll feel awesome knowing how well you’ve treated your man. As an activity that you both want to try, ball sucking can be fun and pleasurable.

Chapter 7: Spit or Swallow?

Perhaps you love going down, or you simply do it because your man loves it. Either way, you’ll eventually find yourself faced with a decision, “Do I spit or swallow”? It seems like women are pretty split on the issue. Some hate swallowing cum, some don’t mind it, and a select few even seem to like it.

Whether to spit or swallow is typically a personal decision made on preference, but sometimes you may have to choose one or the other because of something you can’t change, such as your gag reflex. If you know that holding cum in your mouth until you can find a tissue it going to make you gag, you might prefer to swallow. On the other hand, you might spit because the texture of semen makes you feel sick to your stomach.

Of course, if you have no issue with your gag reflex, you may still take a few things into consideration, like the taste.

Many women look to their partners to help determine when they spit or swallow. It can certainly be hot for him to see you swallow without batting an eyelash, just like he might like ejaculating on your skin. But you don’t have to do what he wants, especially if it’s going to have a negative reaction.

Furthermore, some men tend to take a woman’s tendency to spit as something of a personal insult. Of course, you might just be feeling a little under the weather and want to avoid risking the chance of throwing up.

One thing you can do it to turn off the lights. He never has to know if you spit or swallow. Turning the lights down or off can also be sexy. At the end of the day, if you’re willing and game to suck, stroke or fuck him to orgasm, what you do with that cum is your choice, which leads us to our next point.

You don’t always have to do the same thing. Some days you may feel like you want to swallow. Perhaps you’re more likely when you’re extra turned on or with certain partners. That’s up to you.

And if you just feel like spitting today, that’s okay, too. You can switch it up as you see fit, and doing so may even make sex more interesting.

That’s it, guys!

Remember that the most important key to a killer blow job is enthusiasm: the more fun you’re having, the more pleasure he is going to feel. And even if you can’t pull off the daring deepthroat, you still have the tools to blow your partner’s mind.

Has this been helpful?

Which positions are your favorites and which ones are you just learning for the first time and willing to try out?

Let me know in the comments section

Thank you for reading!

You’ve just finished reading a blog post on SmalleeWrites. Please subscribe, like, comment, share with your friends and come back for more amazing content.

 

 

 

 

3 thoughts on “Blowjob 101

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *