In the spirit of Valentine’s Day, I decided to conduct a small survey on sex and transportation. I decided to find out which means of transportation describes people’s sex life and why. Because these two things are obviously connected, what with people saying “ride” and “take you on the ride of your life”and all.
Without further ado, let’s get into the answers I got from 15 people. Enjoy!!
- Space shuttle:- Takes you out of space
- Uber in Ibadan, Nigeria:- Enough to get by but with periods of drought.
- Ship:- Takes a while for a new person to settle into it but once you figure out each other’s rhythm, it’s a cruise from there on.
- Bullet train:- You have so much you lose count, you probably don’t even keep track of faces too.
- A bus, transport line grade:- Occasional but not so much you lose count.
- Unicycle:- Almost impossible to ride. So it becomes a self service transport system. You keep yourself balanced, by riding yourself.
- Hot air balloon:- Starts slow with a little flame… Then it gets hotter and gets u higher … And the experience is always overwhelming.
- Toy car:- Your sex life is a joke.
- Walking/No ride:- God knows at this point in your life your sex life does not even have a learner’s permit.
- Bike:- Your sex life is two tired right now.
- An empty train:- So many ladies yet you don’t get any action.
- Bicycle:- There’s space for only one lover.
- Train:- Long, relatively slow sex.. Hints of non-human sounds here and there.. A stop doesn’t signify the end of the journey. You stop, take a break, then continue.. Seems like a work out session sometimes (as the name “train” implies… Oh! And trains have “coaches” too)
- Powerbike:- Gives loud revving vibrating orgasms. Damn!
- Train (again!):- Sex keeps going. Fwb kind of relationship, it’s steady for a period of time, stops at times when feelings are getting involved and then picks up sooner or later to keep going till you finally stop to dispel feelings.
I hope you enjoyed reading through this list. Which of these means of transportation is your favorite? What did I miss? Indicate in the comments section.
Oh, and Happy Valentine’s Day!
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