Hello readers,
I hope this post meets you in impeccable health, darlings. As always, your favorite small blogger is happy to have you here!đ
If you know me well, you’ll know how much I’ve been struggling with this side of me, my more creative side; so when I finally wrote a poem I just knew I had to share it here.
It’s not my best poem, not even close, but it’s the most vulnerable I’ve let myself be in a while and I’m very proud of it ’cause for a moment there I thought I’d never feel anything again đ
Good news, this is a sort of introduction to the next blog post which is going to be on what you should do if your partner suffers from depression. I hope you like them both.
And on that note, *drumroll please* Welcome back to SmalleeWrites!đ
People think depression is sadness, they think depression is crying, they think depression is being quiet, but it’s not. Depression is not always that obvious.
Depression is when we smile, but we want to cry. It is when we talk but we’d much rather just be quiet. It is when we pretend that we’re happy but we’re not. It is when you’re sick from crying, tired of trying, smiling but deep inside you’re dying.
That friend of yours might be making all the jokes but crying themselves to sleep every night. They may be canceling on you ’cause their body has made them believe that they just can’t do it. They may be helping you through your rough patches but never once letting on that they’re hurting even worse.
They may be angry and pushing you away because they just want to “deal with it” alone. They may be drinking that much just to drown the pain, or smoking to cloud it but their pain will always learn to swim or fly. So please be kind to everyone.
Fiona Apple said, âWhen youâre surrounded by all these people, it can be lonelier than when youâre by yourself. You can be in a huge crowd, but if you donât feel like you can trust anyone or talk to anybody, you feel like youâre really alone.â and I agree completely because that’s kind of what this poem is about- the poet persona is asking if the subject can be trusted enough to open up to:
Let’s Play Pretend â¤
Pretend I’m drowning with no lifeguard around;
My sanity hanging by a thread
Side by side with my will to carry on
Like the two thieves on the cross.
Would you try to save me and give CPR,
Or add a few more knocks from the hammer?
Pretend you find me laying on the ground,
Oh so pliant under the hands of Pain;
Would you walk away quietly,
Or perhaps hold my hand while
I take my first steps on land
After years spent on that sea of grief.
Pretend, please just pretend
That I’m not as perfect as you think,
I have many good points but just as many bad,
That I wear my fear as a badge of honor
Because I bruise easily and heal slowly;
Would you think it’s too much to handle?
-SmalleeWritesâ
How was that?
And before you go, here’s a quote that I found funnyđ:
âI feel like a defective model, like I came off the assembly line flat-out fucked and my parents should have taken me back for repairs before the warranty ran out.â â Elizabeth Wurtzel, Prozac Nation
If you can relate, leave a comment.
I’d also really like to know what you think about this poem.
I’m looking forward to hearing from all of you. I love youâ¤
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So touching. Nice.
This definitely is my favourite poem of yours. I enjoyed the running metaphor of grief and water, amongst other things. The poem also reminds me of the last scene in Sandra Bullocksâ Gravity, where she lands into the river or lake, and swims out and then crawls unto the land, before she finally stands up.
Adulting comes with it’s expenses… Hang in in there, the sun always raises on the morning that follows the darkness of the night..
Nice piece. Keep writing
Thank you, Peak. I intend to.
Thank you for visiting SmalleeWrites â¤
I liked it D đ
I’m glad you liked it, baby girl.
Thank you for visiting SmalleeWrites â¤
Well, no pretending now. I like the poem. Yes, I could really use a recall now but sigh!…..
đ
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Nice peom
Awesome.
This totally touched me, thanks a lot.
This is my first visit by the way, Iâm definitely coming back!
Thanks again.
Oh wow
Thank you for visiting SmalleeWrites â¤
Hey dee, its pete…
the part where u said âcus I bruise easily and heal slowlyâ ?
Really got me…
I really love what youâre doing…
And… Yoruba girls are the bomb!
đ đ đ
Thank you for visiting SmalleeWrites â¤
just last week I tweeted about loneliness..i had gone to club with my gal friends the vibe amongst them was high but I couldnât feel it..i sat down watching them dance to varieties of ziki but I was lostâŚ
Iâm sorry for the above prattle but honestly depression sucks but what hurts more is the inability of your friends to see it..
about your poem, letâs play pretendâŚ
isnât it the game these days?
we all are on it..
I smile but behind there is a swollen tongue that is hurtingâŚ
I wonât cry in public but my pillow is stained with tears.
I really hope you find the strength to get through this and make it to the other side in good health, ma’am.
Thank you for visiting SmalleeWrites â¤
It’s beautiful, as always. I look forward to more from you.