About five years ago, I conducted a small survey for fun, to try and find out how means of transportation describe sex lives and why. I’m in a good mood today so I’ve decided to bring it back with a few minor changes.

Here’s what I think your preferred mode of transportation says about your sex life. 

PS: Don’t ask me how these two things are connected, it’s you people that have been “riding” and all.

  1. Airplane:- You strike me as someone who likes to experiment — a sexual dynamo if you will. To you, no sexual encounter should ever be the same, so you don’t really have a type. To you, there’s nothing like a good take-off and landing *wink wink 😉
  2. Unicycle:- Like the object, I think you’re almost impossible to ride so sex with you becomes a self-service transport system. You keep yourself balanced, by riding yourself if you catch my drift (o.<) 
  3. Space shuttle:- Sex with you takes your partner(s) out of space.
  4. Uber in Ikorodu:- You get enough sex to get by but not without periods of drought, right?
  5. Bike:- You’re a classic lover. You like sex to be old-school and straightforward. As far as partners go, you are most likely traditional on that end as well and tend to take on only one person at a time. You are a devoted lover who is more interested in the feelings of affection that come with sex than the physical benefits.
  6. Ship:- It might take a while for you to find a new person to settle into it with but once you figure out each other’s rhythm, sex with you is a cruise from thereon.
  7. Train:- The term “all aboard” accurately describes your sex life: You like it anytime, anyway, anywhere.
  8. Bullet train:- You have had so much sex that you have lost count, and you probably don’t even keep track of faces too.
  9. Hot air balloon:- Sex with you burns slow with a little flame…  Then it gets hotter and gets you higher and higher… And the experience is always overwhelming.
  10. Private car:- You strike me as someone who puts comfort and stability above every other thing, but the lack of variety probably doesn’t bode well for your sex life. Try to mix it up a little so your partner(s) don’t get bored.
  11. Toy car:- Your sex life is a joke. 
  12. Walking/No ride: God knows that your sex life does not even have a learner’s permit at this point. Keep trying.
  13. Bicycle:- You’re two tired to have a sex life.
  14. Powerbike:- Sex with you most likely gives loud revving vibrating orgasms. Damn!
  15. Boat: You tend to troll along and float around instead of zipping around. It’s not that you don’t enjoy sex — it’s that you’re extremely picky about your partners.

There you go! I hope you enjoyed reading through this list.

Which of these means of transportation is your favorite? What did I miss? Feel free to let me know in the comments section. 

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Till next time,

Smallee

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